There are better options than buying grocery store flowers and a gift card.
Evie Ebert noticed something unusual five years ago when she had her first child. Evie Ebert noticed something interesting when her social media feeds were filled with perfectly arranged picnics and captions such as “Felt so celebrated today!” Later, she discovered that the same women were sharing a different story in the private mom groups she was a part of.
“It would have been like, ‘Ugh! He wanted to make brunch but that meant he had to be in the kitchen for three hour, using every pan while I had to look after the children,'” Ms. Ebert, who is a Maryland writer and lives on the Eastern Shore. She has posted a humorous Twitter tutorial every year on how to make Mother’s Day less cliche and more fun for the mothers in your lives, the real mothers, and not just a two-dimensional image of a mother.
She said, “I don’t believe you need to spend a lot of cash.” “But you do need to be a little more prepared.”
Do some detective work.
According to Elisabeth JonesHennessy (founder of gift-giving platform GiftMeChic), the most successful gifts are not about the object. Instead, it’s about the research and thought that went into choosing them.
Ms. JonesHennessy said that instead of buying “just something to get something”, picture the person you are buying for and then ask yourself what would make them happier or more interested in something.
You can buy another fig-scented candles if you find another one. If you are having trouble coming up with something unique, some research can help.
“Pay attention to her favourite shops and restaurants,” Ms. Ebert said. “If she has a Pinterest account, see what she’s been saving.”
Is it her ideal day? Do her children surround her or do they escape her? Ms. Ebert offers this radical approach: Ask her. Don’t simply say “hey, what would you like to do for Mother’s Day?” Ms. Ebert said that an open-ended question “puts the pressure on her to figure it out.”
Instead, offer her choices. You could ask her, “Would it be better to have the house all to yourself or to go out?” She said that if you prefer to go out, would you rather do it with your family or with your friends? “Get information, but don’t make her feel like she must direct the day.
Get creative about getting creative.
A mom would be proud to display a handmade card. But you can do more by encouraging your children to write a song for her.
Grant Shellen, a bass player in the surf rock band Aloha Screwdriver, said, “First, think about the core message that you want to convey, perhaps emphasizing one her character traits.” Then, try to capture a few moments in your life.
Three verses alternate with a chorus are a good song structure. “The chorus should contain the lyrics you find most representative or memorable of the song’s content.”
Mobile apps such as Splice or InShot allow you to combine photos and videos into short movies. According to Dan Denegre (owner and filmmaker of Space Race Studio), which creates documentaries and ads for clients such as Ubisoft or the British Broadcasting Corporation, transitions and special effects can be detrimental to the effect. He said that you shouldn’t be afraid of trimming video clips to the exact moment that makes your heart feel something. It’s easier to have a video make an impact on you if it has immediate effect.
M. Denegre suggested that you think about the viewer’s viewing experience. Landscape is best if she plans to project it on her TV. Portrait might be more appealing if she plans to share it on Instagram.
Giving gifts can have a deeper meaning if you involve others. Jordan Ferney, creator of Oh Happy Day, which is a website about celebrating, said, “When we gave our son a record player we asked his older cousins what album they chose and why they loved it.” John Ruhlin founder of Giftology Group a corporate gifting consulting firm, said that siblings should “collaborate to create a handwritten list with things they love about their mom.”
Give your home a makeover.
Marianne Canada, lifestyle expert at HGTV.com, said that she will look around her space and consider what will make her feel loved. Make sure the bed is clean and fresh. You can ask your children to help. With only a week left, you still have time to print and frame a unique photo. She said, “How many people have a hard drive full of photos that they would love to print?”
A potted citrus tree can outlast floral arrangements if she is a good gardener. Ms. Canada suggests a Calamondin or dwarf Meyer lemon tree. She said that you can plant them outside if they are in the correct zone. However, if they aren’t, good drainage and citrus potting mixture along with a sunny window are all you need. She can also use a wheeled tray to transport them throughout the year. You can’t get more fancier than to think, “It’s a beautiful sunny day, I should bring the orange tree outside.”
Note: A vacuum cleaner is not a popular gift. A professional organizer may be able to help you find calm.
It should be nice.
You can present perfect if you have a printer. You don’t need to use cheesy Hallmark messages. Instead, you can download stylish wrapping papers, gifts or cards directly from the design website Almost makes Perfect.
Molly Madfis, who is a designer and has printed materials for step-moms as well as mothers-in law, said that “I’m a big believer Mother’s Day should be about all kinds of moms.” For the gift wrap, Ms. Madfis suggests regular printing paper and for the rest, card stock.
Ms. Ferney increases her gifting skills by wrapping with regular household items. She said that neon pink string purchased at the hardware store makes everything seem brighter. Her children also help her paint grocery bags on paper and match the ribbon with the same color.
Upgrade your existing offerings.
Although you won’t be doing anything new with a bouquet, it is worth the effort. Amber Flack, designer at Little Acre Flowers, Washington, D.C. offers classes. Or you can take an online lesson from Siren Flower. Ms. Flack suggests that you use local flowers whenever possible and limit the number of varieties.
She said, “Start with a base made of greenery. Add in one or two filler blooms, and then add your show-stoppers flowers.” To add a meaningful quote, Mr. Ruhlin suggested that you cut the stems with sharp scissors. He said that “every time she uses it she thinks of you again.”
Ms. Ferney suggests that you choose one thing to maximize impact. She created a beer sampler for her beer-loving friend. She said, “You can do it with anything.” Pick their favorite snack, candy or food.
Send your gift a few days before the deadline if you want it to really stand out. Mr. Ruhlin said, “You remember those who show up first or last or largest.” He suggested that you include a handwritten note to avoid appearing to have mixed up the date. “Say something like: “You’re so important to me, it just couldn’t be delayed. “I wanted to be the first one to wish you a Happy Mother’s Day.”
Holly Burns is a writer in the San Francisco Bay Area.